Special Friends from the Special Olympics

Sam and I met Tom and Kelley Schniedwind about 4 years ago when we first formed "Logan's Heroes" for the Special Olympics Polar Bear Plunge.


Tom called Sam on a cold Sunday afternoon and asked if Logan would be the honorary chairman of the plunge.


We were beyond thrilled, but, more than that, the plunge, and the folks at Special Olympics, really, really changed our lives.  They completely embraced us , and have loved us, and Logan, ever since.


Kelley has written today's blog and, in it, she talks about "how remarkable" our family is.  But, as I've said, many, many, many times we're only this way because of the love and support of YOU!!!  


So, not only does Kelley work at SOMD, but she's honestly become a great friend of mine.  I adore her, and I think SHE'S an amazing person and mother.  


I really appreciate her unique perspective, because she's one of the few people who can see and understand mothers of children with disabilities and mothers of children without disabilities.


Thanks Kelley and Tom for taking the time to write such a GREAT ;)  message.  I, for one, really appreciate it.


xoxo

I want to preface this post by saying that I am not a parent of a child with DS, or with an intellectual disability.  I am fortunate enough to be an 11-year veteran of the staff of Special Olympics Maryland, and I am a mom/stepmom of 5 children ranging in age from 15 to almost 1 year.  I say this because while I, as a result of my job, have perhaps a better understanding than some about the struggles and challenges that Katie and all the other moms face, I am still very much on the outside looking in.

There are so many ways I could have gone with this post, and I have been thinking about it for days now.  I have had the privilege of getting to know Katie, and Sam and Logan and without a doubt, my life is better because of it, so I could talk about that.  I could add to what has already been said about what a bright light Logan is, and how is more like my 3-year-old son than he is different, because all of that is true too.

But as a mom, I thought I’d take the time to tell Katie something.  I have been reading the blog, and every time I do, it reminds me of what I find most remarkable about Katie…and that is just how unremarkable having a son with DS has been to her.  Katie (and Sam too, but for now it’s all about Mom!) has completely taken it in stride that her first-born child happened to have that extra chromosome.  One need only spend five minutes with them to understand the meaning of seeing the person and not the disability because this family lives that.  It is as if Katie was hand-selected to be Logan’s mom…and well, maybe she was.  Now that she has added two daughters to the brood, it is even more evident that Logan is just one part of a busy family of five – albeit a very, very happy part!  Yes, Katie worries, but even in the limited time  that I have spent with her and her family, I can sense that she has never for one minute asked “why me?” or wondered what if would be like if Logan were “normal.”  Actually – I know that for a fact, since she just recently said that she would never want to change Logan.

So I see this and I admire it and I wish the whole world would understand what Katie does – that Logan is a gift to us all, if only we are wise enough to see the person and not the DS.  

But I also know that while I worry about whether or not the other kids in pre-school will like my 3-year-old son, Katie wonders whether the other kids will even give Logan a chance.  I fight daily battles with my older children to get them to study, while Katie fights a different battle to allow Logan into the classroom.  I am working hard now as a parent to prepare my children to be independent and go out into the world, while Katie evaluates that on a completely different scale and her worry about what will happen to Logan after she’s gone takes on an entirely different meaning than mine.

Because I can’t take on her struggles or her challenges anymore than I can know the rewards of being Logan’s Mom, what I would like to do is make Katie a promise.  I promise to raise children who DO see Logan for Logan and not define him by his DS.  It’s not a perfect world and one thing I do know from my work at SOMD is that there is too much hate, intolerance and ignorance out there.  But all of us moms can be a part of the solution by teaching acceptance and love, and helping this next generation to see that different is not a bad word and that intolerance of others just won’t be tolerated.  I want to live in a world in which Logan has all the same opportunities as my children – a world in which Katie’s worries are the same as mine and every other mom’s.  I can’t change the whole world, but if feeling loved, valued and respected by one more family matters, then at least it’s a start.