Bill

I'm writing this post on Monday night.  The kids are asleep and I have a glass of wine in my hand and I'm already crying.

(Sigh) So, I'm writing about my Bill tonight because Tuesday, October 26th, is his birthday.  He would have been 80 years old today.  But, Bill passed away 5 years ago.  And, believe it or not, I still miss him, so much, everyday.  I'm still shocked that he's gone.  I can't believe it.

Bill was my grandfather, my mom's father, and, truly an all around awesome guy.  He was, and still is, one of my favorite people.  I can't even think of words to say about him because he was just so great.  He was funny, and handsome, and kind, and witty, and strong, and so smart, and very crafty.  He was just amazing.

Truly, one of my biggest saddnesses in my life is that Bill will never meet my children.  It breaks my heart.  But, I have a secret to confess, I feel like Bill knows Logan already.  I felt Bill's presence so strongly when we were in the NICU and I still feel him around Logan from time to time.  It's such a peaceful, reassuring feeling.  I think the reason I feel Bill around Logan is because Logan is SO much like Bill.  He's easygoing and funny and kind, but doesn't take any BS from anyone.  I feel like Bill guides Logan a lot, and I know he always will.

So, while I'm still so sad about losing Bill, and I miss him so much, I know he's with us.  I know he knows my little angel, because I believe he played a part in Sam and I being "chosen" as Logan's parents.
Thank you Bill.  We love you so much.  Always.

My Uncle Blake pointed out that you never know how much people mean to you until they're gone. 
I hope you get the chance today to tell someone that you love them.